Mid-Atlantic GDP Set to Increase Tonight with Huge Shovel-Ready Project

December 18, 2009

Tonight, a huge snow storm is set to hit the nation’s East Coast, and the nation’s capital is once again ready to boost the nation’s GDP and lower the nation’s unemployment rate with a shovel-ready project.

In order to maximize employment and GDP, I hereby propose that nobody be allowed to shovel his/her own driveway. Each person must shovel his/her neighbor’s driveway and be paid $20 for doing so. Only in this way will GDP grow as a result of this project. This income will also be taxable for IRS purposes.

Furthermore, in order to maximize employment, I am proposing that the use of machinery in removing snow for commercial lots be outlawed. Shovels are permitted, but to those in the snow removal process: if you truly want to help out your country’s economy, the use of spoons would be ideal so as to allow everyone to share in promoting our nation’s job growth.

Sincerely,

America’s Jobs Czar


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